


Neighbourly noise

by xJane



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, M/M, Phone Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:40:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25430068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xJane/pseuds/xJane
Summary: “Oh, God, there he goes again!”Lucas held two pillows to his ears.The gang was listening intently to the sounds coming from the flat next door.For weeks, Lucas had been complaining about his new neighbour. He was…loud. And Lucas wouldn’t have been so upset if he had been banging around with pots and pans, or playing dubstep, or singing under the shower, or even yelling at an unruly pet at all hours of the day and the night. But he was really miffed that at all hours of the day and the night, he heard… moaning. Panting. Swearing. An endless litany ofOh yesandFeels so goodandGonna come soon.His neighbour was having a lot of very loud sex.***OR IS HE REALLY???
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Comments: 26
Kudos: 168





	Neighbourly noise

**Author's Note:**

> I had the day off. Never mind how I was _supposed_ to spend it (*cough* studying *cough*), this is what I did with it.
> 
>  **Spoiler** Don't remember where it came from as I've had it in my notebook for quite some time, but the prompt was "During phone sex, I suddenly realize the sounds I hear coming out of my neighbour's bedroom coincide remarkably with what I hear going on on the other side of the line..."

“Oh, God, there he goes again!”

Lucas held two pillows to his ears.

The gang was listening intently to the sounds coming from the flat next door.

For weeks, Lucas had been complaining about his new neighbour. He was… _loud_. And Lucas wouldn’t have been so upset if he had been banging around with pots and pans, or playing dubstep, or singing under the shower, or even yelling at an unruly pet at all hours of the day and the night. But he was really miffed that at all hours of the day and the night, he heard… moaning. Panting. Swearing. An endless litany of _Oh yes_ and _Feels so good_ and _Gonna come soon_.

His neighbour was having a lot of very loud sex.

And it bothered Lucas like hell.

He had not been seeing anybody since over a year ago, when he’d broken up with his boyfriend during their last year of university.

And he was really horny.

And his fucking – no pun intended – neighbour wasn’t helping at all.

So after weeks of no sleep, and ever-growing desperation over the sounds coming through the flimsy walls of his small flat, the gang had decided to come over to check it out for themselves.

“That is indeed loud,” Arthur observed, after a couple of minutes of moaning and grunting.

Lucas shuddered.

“And don’t believe him when he says he’s close, either. It goes on and on and on. Sometimes for more than an hour, and then fifteen minutes later it starts again.”

“Well, at least he’s got stamina?”, Yann drily remarked.

“And so does his girlfriend, apparently,” Arthur replied. “Or is it a boyfriend, Lu?”

“That’s the worst part…”, Lucas stated. “I think he’s banging several people.”

“Really?”, Bas sounded way too interested for somebody who had been with his girlfriend for over six years. “Why do you think that?”

“Well,” Lucas hedged. “Sometimes he will keep repeating a pet name, like baby. And then another time he will only call out a completely different pet name, and yet other times he will not use any pet names. And he never uses actual names, that I’ve heard.”

“So your neighbour picks up hookups literally every day?”, Yann asked, incredulously.

“A bit jealous, Yann?”, Lucas smirked. “But yes, he does. A lot of the times more than one per day, even. And then he has insanely _loud_ and often _long_ sex with them.”

“Dude,” Basile said, “do you think he’s a gigolo?”

“Uh!”, Lucas exclaimed. It’s not like he hadn’t thought along those lines either. “I don’t know. I don’t really care, either. All I know is his constant banging is making me horny and I need to go get a hook up of my own before I literally go crazy!”

“Oh, Lulu,” Arthur piped up, “maybe go over to his flat and see if he’ll give you a discount.”

Lucas groaned. Next door, the moaning had now changed into loud swearing. Lucas really hoped this was not another hour-long session.

“What I wonder, though,” Yann said after they’d been sitting a few minutes, listening to the activities next door, “is why you don’t get even with him.”

“Like, have loud sex multiple times a day myself? If only I could, Yann, because fuck, I need a dick up my ass like yesterday.”

“Too much information, Lu!”, Basile screamed, to which Lucas merely glared. It wasn’t like Basile didn’t tell them each and every new position he’d ever tried with Daphné in _way too graphic_ detail. Or, for that matter, hadn’t asked Lucas for advice when he wanted to try anal sex with her. At least he hadn’t ever come back describing how it went, so Lucas could only hope Daphné hadn’t been into it.

Yann laughed.

“I meant like put a movie on full volume or something, but your plan might be even better, Lucas.”

Lucas shrugged. He didn’t think loud movie sounds or music or whatever would deter the stud next door, so he’d never tried. And maybe, secretly, he’d jerked off once or twice listening to his neighbour, but the boys definitely didn’t need to know that, like, ever.

“Well, yeah, as I said, Yann, would that I could. I’m seriously getting desperate.”

“Jesus, man,” Arthur said. “Just download some porn and jerk off, it’s not that hard.”

“I don’t even like porn, though,” Lucas replied, truthfully. “Have you ever seen gay porn? It’s totally unrealistic.”

“And straight porn isn’t?”, Yann sniggered.

“How would I know?”, Lucas retorted. “But that’s not even what bothers me most, I think. I just… it’s too… static, I think? I think I’d like it better if somebody could talk to me or something? I don’t know.”

“Find yourself an onlyfans account of some hot guy then. Or a good looking camboy.”

“Really, Bas?” Lucas raised an eyebrow. “Am I the only one who finds it strange how much Basile knows about the world of online sex?”

“He’s not wrong, though, bro,” Yann said calmly.

“No, thanks,” Lucas waved the suggestion off. “It’s weird to look at a headless body playing with a dildo. And besides, that shit gets expensive really fast.”

“Seems you know quite a bit about it yourself, Lulu,” Arthur snorted.

“May I remind you I have not seen any action in like fifteen months, Arthur?”, Lucas replied, in a very dignified manner. “A man has his needs.”

“If you can’t afford online, you could always go the old-fashioned way, Lu. Phone sex is a lot cheaper.”

“Again, how the fuck are you so educated in these matters, Bas?”, Lucas exclaimed, hitting him with a pillow.

The boys joined in, and after a few minutes of raucous laughter, Yann declared himself the winner as the others laid on the floor trying to regain some breath.

In the quiet that followed, they noticed the blessed silence in the flat next door.

“Oh, thank god!”, Lucas exclaimed. “Let’s hope he’s done for the day.”

“Maybe we should go out anyway. Better safe than sorry, right?”

And for once, Lucas couldn’t argue with Basile’s logic.

~~~

It was markedly silent next door, Lucas marvelled, as he was laying spread out on his bed. He’d gotten home pretty late – or early, depending on how you looked at it – after his night out with the boys. It didn’t happen too often anymore now they were all respectable members of society with real, albeit somewhat shitty, jobs and actual adult responsibilities. And it wasn’t nearly as fun these days, when Basile left before midnight because he had promised Daphné to take her to breakfast, and Arthur had left only thirty minutes later, after a text from Alexia. Yann at least had lasted until two a.m. or so, but then he too had bailed, claiming he needed to get some work done early the next morning or his boss would have his head. Lucas had stayed and danced, bouncing up and down in a throb of strange bodies, grinding with some nameless guy occasionally. At about four, his dance partner had pointed to the hallway, and Lucas had nodded, not really interested in the guy but willing to forget that for twenty minutes of heavy petting against the wall.

The only problem with twenty minutes of heavy petting against a wall was that it had left Lucas aching for more.

He’d woken up late with a semi, and the usual heavy breathing and grunting he could hear next door hadn’t helped with calming down. Luckily, it had ended rather quickly – way faster than it usually did. Maybe Next Door Stud had picked up a disappointing partner for once.

Or maybe it had been really _really_ good, Lucas pondered, considering the absolute lack of further sounds for the last couple of hours.

Well, at least somebody on this floor was getting off, Lucas mused. Maybe he should have gone home with the guy from yesterday, but Lucas hadn’t been able to muster the enthusiasm to pretend to be into him after he’d come in his pants after just some grinding. Lucas tried to take it as a compliment to his sex appeal, but he wasn’t about to go home with some guy who probably wouldn’t last long enough to deliver.

He thought about getting himself off, but he didn’t really have the energy. For once, he wished Next Door Stud would get going again. It didn’t always work, especially not when he was calling names and shouting compliments, but when it was just him moaning and whispering, it somehow got Lucas in the mood sometimes. He remembered the conversation with the boys yesterday, about camboys.

Maybe they’d been onto something, Lucas vaguely thought.

He grabbed his phone and started aimlessly googling some stuff. Nothing really stood out, though. The outrageous titles made Lucas cringe rather than get hard and the cropped headless bodies in the thumbnails weirded him out.

Idly, he typed “gay phone sex” into the search bar, and was amazed at how many results popped up. Obviously, even in this era of video and social media, phone sex was still thriving.

Lucas had no idea how to filter through the results, though. At least the camboys still gave you something to go on.

He limited the search results to Paris. Might as well, he thought, with no other filter criteria in mind.

As with the camboys, though, he was not interested in all the boastful claims. “Guaranteed to make you come in 2 minutes!” Seriously, Lucas thought, if I wanted somebody to not put in any effort, I could have gotten sucked half-heartedly in the bar yesterday. Some added blurry pictures of a face or a dick. No thanks, Lucas thought.

He kept scrolling until he saw a link which intrigued him. It was just one word, “Polaris”. Interesting, he thought. The North Star. How on earth did that fit in with phone sex?

On an impulse, he clicked the link. On the page that opened, nothing much appeared, except some rates, a phone number, and a link to “Guidelines”. Lucas ignored that, and stared at the number.

Then, he clicked away from the webpage, and sighed. He listened. Still nothing next door, though.

Ah, fuck it. He could always hang up. A bit nervous, he opened up his browser again and clicked on the number, listening to the dial tone. He almost chickened out again when somebody answered.

A deep, gravelly voice said into his ear: “Hi. Can I help you?”

Shit. What the fuck were the rules for this kinda stuff? Maybe Lucas should have read the guidelines.

“Hello?”, the voice repeated.

“Uh… yeah, uh, hi,” Lucas stuttered.

“Hi,” the voice answered, light, easy.

“Uhm, yes, uh – well, uh…”

“Is this your first time?”, the guy on the other end cut through the chase, not unkindly.

“Uh, yeah,” Lucas mumbled. “Sorry, I don’t really –”

“Hey, no big deal,” the guy answered. “If you want to ask me some questions, go ahead.”

“Uh, what is your name?”

“Ah.”

The guy laughed, and it somehow felt like a million little bells cascaded down Lucas’ spine.

“You go directly for the personal stuff, huh?”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to…” Lucas felt like an idiot.

“That’s okay. I can’t give you my real name, though. I could give you a fake one, if you’d like, but why don’t you choose a name for me, if you want?”

“Uh, okay, uhm, how about David?”

Lucas had no idea why he chose that name. Vaguely he thought about his mom sending him some quote about David and Goliath the other day.

The guy laughed again.

“Hmm, I like that. Like the statue by Michelangelo.”

“I’m not sure I have seen that,” Lucas blurted out, then facepalmed. God, he was supposed to have phone sex, not admit he didn’t know shit about art.

“You probably have. It’s pretty famous. Sexy, too. Maybe google it while you get comfortable, yeah?”

“Uh… okay.”

Lucas thought he’d better do as suggested, seeing as the guy knew how this shit was supposed to work. So he laid back against his pillows, turned his phone on loudspeaker and did an image search for Michelangelo’s David.

David at the other end of the line was right. Lucas had seen this statue before, in history class or somewhere, when he was younger. He had been completely overwhelmed by it. He had been struggling with the realization he was into boys at the time, and this exquisite specimen of naked man had been somewhat of an eyeopener.

Fitting, he thought. He wondered if the David he was talking to looked like this marble piece of perfection.

“So, are you comfortable?”, David asked in his ear, whispering.

It startled Lucas. He’d almost forgotten what they were doing here.

“Uh, yeah. You were right, I did see that statue before.”

David laughed melodiously again.

“Some eye candy never hurts, does it? Tell me, what would you like?”

“Uhm…”

Lucas had no idea. He’d never engaged in phone sex with any of his boyfriends, so how the fuck did you go about it?

David whispered again, softly.

“Do you want me to tell you what I am doing?”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” Lucas said, uncertain.

David moaned softly.

“I am imagining you… your body… your big dick…”

Stupid, Lucas thought. David had no clue how big his dick was.

“Uh, David? Maybe you can talk about yourself?”

“Mmmm. I’m hard already. I want to make this last, though. Do you want me to start jerking off?”

Even more ridiculous, Lucas thought. Why was he asking Lucas what to do? How was that supposed to get _him_ anywhere?

“Sorry,” he said. “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea…”

“We don’t have to do this if it’s not your thing,” David said, his voice calm, but soft, a bit hypnotizing. He really had a great voice for this kind of thing, Lucas thought. “You can just hang up, if you’d like. Or we could talk a bit, see if the mood still strikes in a few minutes.”

Suddenly Lucas had an idea.

“Uh, wait. Maybe you can… Nevermind. It’s probably stupid…”

“Hey,” David interrupted. “Just get it out. I can always say no, and then you hang up, no harm done.”

“Okay,” Lucas agreed. “Uhm, I was wondering, if maybe, you could just… you know, instead of describing stuff… just let me listen to you? I mean, while you… make yourself feel good?”

A beat passed, and Lucas wanted to hang up, mortified, but then David spoke again, intimately.

“Yeah. Yeah, I can do that. No problem.”

Good, Lucas thought, as David softly started breathing in his ear. Gradually the breathing became heavier, faster, shallower, and Lucas felt something stir in his boxers. He didn’t speak, and David seemed to understand that he should continue. He started moaning quietly, and then a bit louder, occasionally breathing out a soft _Mmmmm, yeah_ or _So hot_. It really was rather sensual, Lucas thought, listening to somebody pleasuring themselves. Just as David became a bit more vocal though, moaning louder, Lucas’ peace was rudely interrupted by the usual sex noises next door.

Fuck, Lucas thought. Fuck.

He didn’t want to hear his neighbour getting off, he wanted to hear David getting off.

And he definitely did not want to hear moaning and grunting in stereo.

And then he almost yelled out loud.

In fucking stereo.

He covered the speaker of his phone with his hand.

The sounds continued. Behind the thin wall, he heard moaning, gradually getting louder.

Holy fucking god.

“David?”, Lucas said.

“Yeah?”, the answer came quickly.

“Could you call me darling?”

He put the phone under his pillow before David could reply and moved as close to the wall as possible.

“Sure, darling,” he heard from his neighbour’s bedroom.

Holy. _Fucking_. God.

He was having phone sex with his neighbour.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

What to do now? Hang up? Continue? That last one was really not much of an option, as Lucas’ semi was now completely flaccid again. He still heard David moaning, harder now, faster.

Oh, for the love of all that was holy. Lucas pulled on some jeans and a shirt, and picked up his phone again.

“David?”

“Yes, darling?”

Oh, shit, the dude was good.

“Are you getting close?”

“Do you want me to, darling?”

“Yes, please,” Lucas said, standing up and walking to his front door.

“Okay, darling… I’m close… I’m gonna come for you, darling…”

Lucas stepped out in the hallway.

“Okay, David… I want you to come for me… Let me hear you come…”

Lucas pounded on his neighbour’s door with all his might.

“Are you gonna come, David?”

He kept battering the door as loud as he could. He could hear his efforts through the phone.

“Uh, yes, darling,” David said, sounding a bit flustered, irritated.

“Come on then, David! Do it!”

Lucas didn’t let go of his pounding, now adding some kicking for good measure. David was going to have to deal with this somehow, right?

Sure enough, he heard in his ear: “Just one second, darling… nearly there… Gimme just one second, okay?”

The sound went muffled, as if David had put his hand on the microphone.

Lucas stopped his pounding just as the door opened to a furious looking guy who definitely was _not_ seconds away from coming. He was fully clothed, his jeans were all buttoned up, and he definitely wasn’t out of breath.

“What the fuck?”, he said, obviously enraged but quietly, with his phone in his hand.

Lucas lifted his own phone.

“Hi, David.”

~~~

David was actually really hot, Lucas noted, especially with that bewildered look in his pretty eyes, looking from Lucas to Lucas’ phone to the one in his own hand.

“What… Is this you?”, he gestured to his phone.

“Uh-uh.” Lucas nodded, and added for good measure, “Unless you’re having phone non-sex with two people who call you David right this very minute, of course.”

“Shit.”

David ended the call, and ran his hand through his hair. Messy, Lucas observed, but somehow sexy. Almost artfully tousled.

“So,” Lucas said. “I’m your neighbour, in case you didn’t realize.”

“Shit,” David repeated.

“Yeah,” Lucas agreed.

“Fuck.”

“Well, that’s what I called you for, right?”, Lucas quipped, and then he couldn’t help himself. This whole situation was really too embarrassingly preposterous, and he laughed out loud.

For a few moments, David stared at him, visibly debating whether to yell at him or laugh along, until he decided on the latter.

Lucas pocketed his phone and leaned against the doorpost, laughing until his sides hurt. David mirrored him, standing in front of him.

“God, I’m sorry,” Lucas said as he regained some of his bearing. “I’m not laughing at you, I swear.”

“Yeah, sure,” David answered. “You might as well come in.”

He pulled the door wide open, and gestured for Lucas to step through.

“You sure?”, Lucas grinned. “Wouldn’t want to hold you back. Weren’t you right on the verge of an orgasm?”

“Oh, shut up,” David answered.

“No, seriously,” Lucas giggled again. “I’m gonna want my money back. You promised me you were gonna come for me.”

David raised an eyebrow.

“Oh, so you want a show, then?”

Lucas sputtered.

“What? No! I just…”

He caught David trying to hide his laughter behind his hand.

“Oh, fuck off, you wanker.”

“I wasn’t the one wanking.”

Another perfect eyebrow raise.

“You think I was? I was fucking pounding on your door, I didn’t have a hand free.”

David looked at him, unimpressed, until they burst out in laughter again. Lucas let himself fall down on a comfortable looking couch, and moved over to the side as David sat down beside him.

They stared at each other for a moment.

Lucas took in David’s bright eyes, his strong jawline, his broad shoulders. He let his gaze wander a bit, over David’s chest, down to his hips, his legs in tight, ripped jeans. Not bad, Lucas decided. Not bad at all.

Probably better than the marble David he’d been ogling earlier.

Although the marble David was showing off his splendid muscles, his taut ass, and his impressive package.

He wondered about real David’s assets.

He heard a small creak as David moved on the couch, and Lucas quickly whipped his eyes back up to David’s face, before he got lost in trying to imagine what David was hiding underneath his clothes.

“So, David,” Lucas started, but he was interrupted.

“Eliott. My name is Eliott.”

Lucas looked over pointedly.

“I thought you couldn’t give me your real name, Eliott.”

Eliott shrugged.

“Okay, Eliott. I’m Lucas.”

“Better than darling.”

It was Lucas’ turn to raise an eyebrow, but Eliott didn’t react.

“So, Eliott,” Lucas tried again, “I must say I’m a lot less jealous of your sex life now.”

“Huh, what?”, Eliott seemed confused.

“God, I thought you were having sex literally all the time! But you were just faking it for your customers, weren’t you?”

“Mmmm,” Eliott replied. “You could hear all that?”

“Flimsy walls, Eliott.”

“Shit. I’m sorry. I didn’t think about that.”

“Oh, well. At least now I don’t think you’re the biggest playboy in France anymore. I honestly was so confused. It sounded like you were banging somebody else every hour.”

“Ah. Well. As you may have noticed, I try to be… accommodating.”

Lucas smirked.

“You were very accommodating. Calling me darling, asking me if I wanted you to be close. That should have been my first clue you were totally faking it, by the way.”

“Yeah, well. Usually there’s really nothing sexy about it for me. I need to keep my focus. I’m flattered you thought I could go five or six times a day though.”

“This is probably where I should confess I have tried to curse you with a crippling loss of stamina.”

Eliott looked over, pretending to be hurt, placing a hand on his heart in a huge, floundering dramatic gesture.

“What?”, Lucas replied, grinning widely. “I’m reasonably sure it didn’t actually affect anything.”

“Let’s hope so,” Eliott stated. “Otherwise at least I know where you live, to come punch you in the face.”

Lucas chuckled, and they sat in silence again, until Eliott turned on the couch, sitting cross-legged facing Lucas.

“So why did you call me? If you had no idea what I was doing, I mean.”

Lucas blushed.

“Ah, uhm, I mean – well, I have been single for quite a while and – well, hearing you getting laid all the time – or well, I thought you were getting laid, at least – anyway, it made me, well, you know – and I just wanted… some, uh, stimulation, I guess – uh, anyway, I – yeah.”

Eliott laughed.

“So you decided to call a random phone sex line for some help jerking off?”

“Fuck off. Your whole money-making scheme is based on lonely gays calling some random phone sex line for some help jerking off.”

“Hey. I wasn’t trying to make you feel bad. Especially since you were so sweet and innocent.”

“Really? I, uh – I had no idea what to do, really.”

“That much was clear,” Eliott chuckled. “But as I said, it was sweet. It was nice, actually, you not wanting me to describe how many fingers I had inside me or whatever.”

“Is that how it usually goes?”

Eliott shrugged.

“There’s all kinds, as I’m sure you heard. But I don’t really like that kind of stuff. I’m not good at imagining that shit. I usually keep it very vague. Some people don’t like that, and get angry. I don’t mind too much though, they’ll hang up and call somebody else and get their fix somehow.”

“But wouldn’t it be easier if you really played with yourself? I mean, it can’t be easy faking all that moaning and panting and yelling.”

“As we’ve established, ain’t nobody got the stamina for that. Besides, I usually work while I have somebody on the line.”

“You work? What do you do?”

“Paint, or sketch, usually.”

“Really? Wow, that’s cool. So you’re an artist?”

“Yeah. This whole phone sex gig was helping me make ends meet for a while, and then I guess it kinda became a nice side gig? I mean, it’s not like it’s hard work.”

Lucas snorted, throwing a pointed look at Eliott’s lap.

“Not hard, he says.”

“Fuck you.”

Eliott swatted at his arm.

“I’ve said it before, dear David, that's what I called you for.”

“Well,” Eliott said, and then stopped. He looked at Lucas. His gaze was… heated.

“What?”, Lucas said, shifting a little, a strange feeling fluttering through his stomach.

“It might be better without a phone. And you’re here anyway, so…”

Lucas looked at Eliott. He really was hot. And he sounded really sexy when he fake moaned, it might be interesting to find out if it was even hotter if it was real.

Lucas placed his fingers tentatively on Eliott’s chest. He felt Eliott’s heart beating.

“How much would you charge for that?”

“Shut up.”

Lucas laughed, loud and free.

“And what about my curses to your stamina?”

“Shut up, Lucas.”

“Will you answer your phone while we’re at it?”

Eliott pressed his lips to Lucas’ mouth, and took advantage of Lucas’ half-hearted protest to lick into it immediately. Lucas kissed back, hard and deep, until they broke free, gasping for air.

“I told you to shut up,” Eliott whispered.

“I’d rather you make me scream your name,” Lucas whispered back.

“Maybe not,” Eliott said, cutting off Lucas’ protest with a kiss. “My neighbour might get upset.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Lucas muttered.

“That’s what you called me for, after all,” Eliott managed to groan out, before they stopped talking all together.

~~~

Eliott’s moans sounded way fucking better from underneath Lucas. And his stamina was not affected by Lucas’ curses at all.

**Author's Note:**

> Please feel free to point out any errors. 
> 
> And, as always, comments bring a smile to my face, and I could definitely use more smiles.
> 
> <3


End file.
